Mid-life crisis

 People talk about a "mid-life crisis" like it is some dramatic unraveling, but I am starting to believe, for most people, it is not a crisis at all. 

I think it simply takes most of us this long to finally begin figuring out who we are and what we actually want out of life. It is the moment we wake up and realize life is painfully fleeting, but it's also not too late to hold on with both hands.

It feels like finding my voice after years of whispering, recognizing what truly defines me, and finally wanting the world to see me as I am instead of who I thought I had to be. 

It is a reckoning with clarity, a deep knowing of how I do not want to live anymore. I reject the ideas of being ruled by stress, anxiety, fear, or the need to carry everything alone. And it is the quiet, hopeful truth that I realize that I do want to love and be loved, to experience every joy God still has for me, and to finally unshackle myself from the mistakes and shadows of the past.

It's not falling apart. It's coming home.